Semi-Precious Metaphors

Growing

2012-01-24T23:47:00.000-08:00

I'm about to become one of those sappy people who annoy me.

Over the past few months I've been falling deeper under the spell of the little girl who takes up residence in the bedroom next to mine. I haven't felt this way about her before, and it hurts a little to admit that I didn't fall in love with her as a baby, and as a toddler, I had a hard time not tossing her out the window. I guess I tolerated her. Of course I loved her, but I'm beginning to really understand the mother/daughter relationship. It's like we're getting to know each other for the very first time.

Sometimes I can't stop looking at her. She's pretty amazing. She has become a girl who wants to do the right thing and please us. Although we have to constantly remind her to keep her room clean, she is always more than willing to sweep up the kitchen or feed the animals. Before this, I felt like I was trudging through an endless tar pit. I felt like no matter what I did, her behavior never got better. I felt out of control and frustrated. I still feel that from time to time, but not in a discouraging, tear-my-hair-out way anymore.

I feel like all of the sudden I want time to slow down. She's careening towards five and there isn't anything I can do to stop it. From the time she was born until about a year ago, all I wanted was for her to hurry up and get to the next stage. Now I wish I could rewind, but I've decided to truly enjoy and soak up every moment I get to spend with her before she heads off to kindergarten and learns to say "remember" instead of "me-member" or "forehead" instead of "two-head".

She's been asking a lot of questions about the future lately. She'll ask me things like, "Mommy, when I get bigger, where will I live?" or, "When I get bigger can I drive all by myself?". When she starts asking things like that, it sort of breaks my heart. It's weird. I know she's excited to grow up, and she's someone who will always be looking to the future. I'm like that. I just can't explain that while I'm smiling about her question when she asks me with that sincere look in her eye, I feel like crying on the inside.

This is all new to me. I was starting to lose hope that her and I would have a good relationship. It's sounds melodramatic, but it's not a normal feeling to have. At least, it doesn't seem like it from what I see in other moms. I know there are probably people out there with four-year-olds who have maybe had this experience in reverse. They fell in love with their baby from the second they saw it, and now are fighting the frustrating battles that come with having a toddler. They'll probably think I'm crazy. That's fine. I thought they were crazy when they gushed about how their baby slept through the night.

This is just a sort of long-winded way of saying that things are going well here. I feel like I've started a whole new life with Audrey, and I'm excited about our relationship.

2011

2012-01-01T11:16:00.000-08:00

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
I Skyped. I became a Lifeguard Instructor Trainer (I teach people to teach Lifeguarding), and a Water Safety Instructor Trainer with the Red Cross. I gave blood on my birthday. My friends blind folded me, kidnapped me, dressed me up in 80s garb, and took me to a surprise birthday dinner. I met my friend at the airport after she spent five months in Ireland and I totally jumped in her arms and we spun around, movie style. We went to Folk Life in Seattle Center. I went to Hoop Fest in Spokane. I went on an epic road trip with Audrey and my best friend. I became the mother of a four-year-old. Justin and I celebrated 6 years of marriage. We surfed for two days straight. I got fired (ask me about it if you want, it's a long story). Modeled for some photo shoots. Realized I have some of the best friends anyone could ask for.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 
Here’s what I wrote last year, with my updates beneath.

Okay, looking ahead to 2011:

• Do more artsy stuff. I miss it. Well, I sort of did this.

• Get in shape. Lose five pounds. Gain muscle. Nope. I didn't do very well at this one.

• Do the splits. I'm getting closer. I tore something in my groin, so I haven't been able to do much in the way of flexibility.

• Nurture Audrey's artistic side. I see it developing! She draws, colors, and paints all the time. It's the only thing she has an attention span for (much like me).

• Grow out my hair. I'm doing well so far...we'll see how long I can stand it. I did! I grew it to my shoulders and then cut it off...

• Really get into the bible. Every day. Well, I did better this year, but still working on it.

• Get a hat trick (three goals in one game) in hockey. Almost.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? 
I became an aunt twice this year and my cousin also had a baby. Along with countless others.

4. Did anyone close to you die? 
No.

5. What countries did you visit?
None, but we're going to Cabo in a couple of days...I don't think that counts.

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Discipline. Direction. Patience. An awesome career now that Audrey will be starting school.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

January 16. Memorial Day weekend. July 4. July 28. October 9.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? 
Let me get back to you on that one.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Well, there are a few.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had to get a biopsy on my thyroid. They found abnormal cells which they have to keep an eye on. I also got my first sinus infection, ugh.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I just got an iPhone. I can't think of anything else right now.

12. Where did most of your money go?
Vacations. Medical bills. College loans...lame.

13. What did you get really excited about?
My friend coming home. Summer. Cabo!

14. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO

15. Compared to this time last year, are you: 
– happier or sadder? The same.
– thinner or fatter? Fatter.
– richer or poorer? The same. Pretty much.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of? 
Swimming. Snowboarding. Seeing my best friends.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of? 
Worrying. Getting poked with needles in the neck. Dealing with people who didn't deserve my time.

18. How did you spend Christmas?
We always have three. Christmas Eve with my family, and then with Justin's mom, and Christmas morning with his dad

19. What was your favorite TV program?
Modern Family, Community, Grey's Anatomy.

20. What were your favorite books of the year?
The Hunger Games trilogy.

21. What was your favorite music from this year? 
Sara Bareilles, ADELE, Eli Lieb...

22. What were your favorite films of the year?
Black Swan, No Strings Attatched, Colombiana

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I gave blood on my actual birthday. Later that week my friends kidnapped me for a surprise birthday dinner complete with 80s clothing.

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less "little man" syndrome in those around me...

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Same as always...comfortable.

26. What kept you sane?
My amazing friends.

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011. 
If you find people who get you and back you up no matter what, keep them in your life because it's kind of a rare quality these days.

2011-11-03T11:12:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile.

I've been thinking about Audrey lately. I mean, it's kind of impossible not to because she's RIGHT THERE. ALL. THE. TIME. But I've been thinking about how she's almost 4 1/2. How crazy is that? This time next year I'll have a kindergartner. How is that possible? I can vividly remember this time four years ago. We were living in Seattle and I was mysteriously nauseous. ALL THE TIME. I was going about my life, figuring out what my next step would be, all the while knowing somewhere in the back of my head that it was all about to change dramatically. At that time there was no way I could know exactly how much everything would change, but I was excited.

I started to get my first clue that our lives would never be the same in the middle of what would be nearly four months of "morning" sickness. I saw a bit of her personality when I spent four exhausting hours trying to push her stubborn little body out into the world. She does things on her terms. I knew for an absolute fact that we were in for it when the first thing I remember about her is screaming. Not some tender moment of her warm skin on mine or how she looked into my eyes for the first time. No. From the second she entered the world (or perhaps before) she was screaming. She didn't stop until she was about four months old, and I'm convinced that it was only to take a breath and start up again. It was definitely one of the most challenging times in my life.

She's been a challenge since the second she was born. Every new stage brought a sense of hope that maybe, just maybe this stage would be easier. Nope. Never the case. Through this though, I've always known that there was a reason that my baby wasn't like the others, as frustrating as that is. While everyone around me was going on and on about how beautiful it was to be a mom and how their baby was perfect, I was wondering what I was doing wrong. It actually began to make me mad. I thought either I got the one bad baby, or everyone else was lying about how easy it was. Was mine broken? If all of these other babies were sleeping through the night and never cried, it must be me. I must not be a good mom. Why didn't I like my baby? I felt like I was going through the motions a lot of the time, and I didn't instantly bond with her. I mean, I had that moment right after she was born when I held her squishy body and thought, "Wow. That came from me." But it got harder to like this little person who kept me up every night for over a year and seemed to cry all the time. What kind of person dislikes a baby?

When I look back, I realize that it wasn't that she was crying all the time, but that she was never content. She has never been content to stay in one place or to stay in one stage. As a baby, she wasn't content until she could roll over, and then crawl, and then pull herself up on the coffee table. Finally, after four years, I'm realizing that she is me. That screaming bundle who they laid on my chest and hasn't let us rest since the day she was born is me. She is not content to settle. Every night before bed she asks me what we're doing the next day and where we're going. She'll ask it incessantly until I answer. She's always on the move, talking, running, speeding through life at a million miles an hour. She gets frustrated when she doesn't instantly learn how to do something. She's persistent to the point of being irritating. She is either asleep or awake. There is no in between. She lives in extremes. When she is happy, she's rainbows and unicorns and excitement. When she's mad, well, there are holes punched in the back of her wooden door. She can switch between the two almost faster than I can blink. She is constantly running, climbing, jumping, drawing, talking. She is explosive. She is creative. She is ridiculously observant. She is not content to let the world pass her by.

I see so much of her in me now. I didn't see it before. She has looked like her daddy up until recently. We clashed so much before that I sometimes didn't feel like she was mine. I didn't have those moments of laying in bed with her in perfectly diffused sunlight just basking in the happiness of being a mom. I just got by. But now? I have realized that of all of the times in her life, right now it what I love. It's ridiculously frustrating at times. She's four. That's a given. I see her personality shining through. She is not content to settle. She won't take no for an answer, which right now is the most frustrating thing, but in the future it means she won't just believe everything she hears. She is constantly pushing herself to be better. She is strong physically and emotionally. She is immensely empathetic. She is always thinking about what would make someone else happy. When we go to the store, she doesn't ask for a million toys for herself, instead she asks if she could please get this or that for her cousins. She finds little toys and books in her room and asks if she can put them in our box for the "Christmas kids" (Operation Christmas Child).

It's going to be a struggle, but now after four long years I can see that it's worth it. The hardest things are always the most worth it, and God knows that, just like Audrey, I'm not content to settle. She's wasn't like all of the other babies, but that means she won't be like all of the other people. I think that's a really good thing. She will be strong and independent. She won't settle, and she will do great things because of it.

"So keep your eyes set on the horizon, on the line where blue meets blue

And I'd bet that silver lining, well I know it'll find you soon..."

--1,000 Ships by Rachel Platten

2010

2010-12-30T10:28:00.000-08:00

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
Played guitar with a strings group at church. Joined a book club. Got called for jury duty and actually got picked as an alternate. Played hockey against a college women's team. Got fingerprinted. Went to the Bodies exhibit. Went surfing (in March...in Washington), and then did it again in August. Trained 150 people how to use an AED. Got a biopsy on my thyroid (creepiest experience ever). Joined the Women's Ministries at church. Managed the pool. Started taking ballet. Saw Jack Johnson at the Gorge. Watched volleyball. Saw Ingrid Michaelson perform in Seattle. Taught four lifeguarding classes. Taught a babysitting class. Earned my Lifeguard Instructor Trainer certification. Donated blood.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 

Here’s what I wrote last year, with my updates beneath.

Resolutions for 2010:

• Get into better shape.
I kind of just stayed the same. Sadly.

• Play my guitar.
Done and done. I've been playing a lot this year. In front of people even.

• Read my bible every day and journal more. Get through the bible in one year again.

Well, I did okay sometimes, and sometimes not, but I'm almost through the bible again.

• Complete some sort of wall art for our dining room.
Fail. I started and then got bored.

• Scrapbook more. Finish Audrey's scrapbook.

Double fail. I just can't get into it anymore. I tried though.

• Decorate Audrey's room.
Nope. We just kept putting it off and waiting. Maybe this spring.

• Score ten goals in hockey this season.
Did that.

• Teach Audrey her ABCs.

This actually happened. She can even write most of her letters.

Okay, looking ahead to 2011:

• Do more artsy stuff. I miss it.
• Get in shape. Lose five pounds. Gain muscle.
• Do the splits. I'm getting closer.
• Nurture Audrey's artistic side. I see it developing!
• Grow out my hair. I'm doing well so far...we'll see how long I can stand it.
• Really get into the bible. Every day.
• Get a hat trick (three goals in one game) in hockey.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? 
Um, I hate these ones because I feel like I'm always forgetting someone...Heather. Amber. And there are quite a few pregnant ladies out there now...

4. Did anyone close to you die? 
Not super close, no. I only went to one funeral this year.

5. What countries did you visit?
None.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
Direction. Patience. More surfing/snowboarding/getting away with Justin. And one more thing.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

The weekend of March 20 was pretty good. Surfing with my best friend for the first time. July 31, one of my best friends' weddings.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? 
Getting my LGIT cert. It doesn't sound like a big deal, but it was a two year battle that should have taken much less time. I'm one of three in our entire area. Also, we finished landscaping our front and back yards.

9. What was your biggest failure?
My lack in patience sometimes.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had to get a biopsy on my thyroid. They found abnormal cells which they have to keep an eye on. I got a stress fracture in my foot from surfing in August.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
iMac.

12. Where did most of your money go?
Vacations. Medical bills. College loans...lame.

13. What did you get really excited about?
There were a lot of things to get really excited for. I had a lot of amazing experiences this year.

14. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Dynamite by Taio Cruz. Anything Ingrid Michaelson...143 by Bobby Brackins.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you: 
– happier or sadder? Happier, although there was a couple low months.
– thinner or fatter? Fatter, but more in shape endurance-wise.
– richer or poorer? The same. Pretty much.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of? 
Swimming. Snowboarding. Seeing my best friends.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of? 
Worrying. Getting poked with needles in the neck.

18. How did you spend Christmas?
We always have three. Christmas Eve with Justin's mom, Christmas morning with his dad, and Christmas day with my family.

19. What was your favorite TV program?
We started watching Grey's Anatomy and Bones this years. Both are pretty good. Bones is probably my favorite. Glee was definitely not.

20. What were your favorite books of the year?
I read a lot of C.S. Lewis books. That guy has amazing insight.

21. What was your favorite music from this year? 
This is Love worship album. Parachute by Ingrid Michaelson. Jack Johnson's new album.

22. What were your favorite films of the year?
Eh. I haven't been impressed with movies in years...but, Date Night. Life as We Know It. Harry Potter. Burlesque. Because they actually surprised me by being slightly good.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
We went to Cave B winery and stayed. Went wine tasting. I turned 26... 

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less drama and worrying.

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Lame...

26. What kept you sane?
Exercise. Friends. Justin.

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010. 
Oh wow...lets see...worry less, pray more.

Happy New Year.

2010-12-29T10:21:00.000-08:00

I got this idea from my friend Sarah. It hadn't occurred to me either that in less than a week, a decade is ending. That's kind of a big deal considering I've only been alive for a little over two decades. In high school, when they asked us what we thought we'd be doing in ten years, I'm not sure this is what I pictured. I would have never imagined that I would have had many of the experiences that I have had in the last ten years.

I've never been one to make grandiose plans about the future. I barely plan farther than a week ahead. Thinking ahead ten years is such an abstract thing for me. I mean, I can think of a million things that I would like my life to be, but that doesn't mean they're realistic. I guess, as cheesy as it might sound, I like to live one day at a time. I think it makes for less disappointment in the end. Really, who am I to say what my life should or shouldn't be like. I can't see the big picture. I'm not really a big picture person. I love the details. I'll leave the rest up to God. He's better at it than I am.

And on that note, some things that I have accomplished in the last decade (and Sarah, some of these might be repeats...sorry:

I survived Y2K.
I watched the Twin Towers get hit and collapse. I remember attending a candle light prayer vigil in our small town and truly appreciating the fact that even though we were thousands of miles away, we could be a part of the healing through prayer.
I graduated from high school.
I became a lifeguard.
I met the love of my life on New Year's Eve 2002/03. We met on a Twister board and never looked back.
I snowboarded for the first time. It was a goal of mine since I first heard about snowboarding in elementary school.
I broke my first bone while snowboarding.
I graduated with an Associated degree.
I lost my grandpa to lung cancer and had the worst year of my life.
I got engaged on a mountaintop while snowboarding.
I met people who are some of my very best friends to this day.
I got married.
I travelled out of the country for the first time on my honeymoon.
I got stung by a jellyfish.
I had an amazing first year of marriage despite all the people who said it would be the hardest.
I travelled to Minneapolis, visited my best friend, and went to the Mall of America.
I got pregnant and had a miscarriage.
I moved to Seattle.
I got accepted to the Art Institute of Seattle's photography program.
I got pregnant again.
I did the practical thing for once and said no to the Art Institute and enrolled at CWU-Lynnwood to finish my degree. So long, photography school.
I survived 24 hours of labor.
I had a baby and had one of the most sleep deprived and stressful years of my life.
I spent a winter as a snowboarding instructor.
I finished my Bachelor's degree while dealing with a colicky baby.
I bought a house.
I did a triathlon.
I finally learned to surf.
I started playing ice hockey.
I found out who my real friends are.
I went to six funerals.
I went to eleven weddings. I was in three. Justin was in one.

That's just a glimpse of the last decade, but it definitely didn't turn out the way I thought it would. I'm not even sure I had any idea what it would be like. All I know is, even through the mistakes and regrets, I wouldn't trade any of it. I learned, I grew, and I got closer to God. I'm not even going to try to guess what this next decade will bring. All I know is that I want to keep growing and maturing. I don't want to become stagnant. This year really will be a new chapter in our lives. There are many things that are falling into place even now that are going to make this another decade to remember.

And if I have learned one thing from this past decade, it's this: You can plan and hope and dream all you want, but only God knows what the future holds. If you hang onto your own plans and desires too closely, you're only asking for disappointment. Letting God take care of the planning can be one of the most difficult things to do, but His plans are more fulfilling and amazing than yours ever could be. I'm not great at doing this. In fact, I'm pretty bad at letting God take control, but when I have given everything over to Him, I've had some of the most amazing experiences of my life.

Happiness is...?

2010-11-10T00:34:00.000-08:00

"Mommy. I love you. Are you happy? I want you to be happy."

Amidst all the frustrations and struggles of having a strong-willed three-year-old, there are bright spots. They may be few and far between, but they do more for me than she'll ever know. I sometimes have to take a step back and remember that if I looked at this honestly, I know I wouldn't have her any other way. It's extremely hard to do this sometimes. When everything is a struggle, from the color of her socks to what she wants for lunch, and everything in between, it's easy to get frustrated and stuck in a rut of negativity.

I have to remind myself that the part of her personality that leaves me pulling out my hair, is also what is going to make her a strong leader someday. Someone who doesn't take no for an answer and who never compromises who she is. I realize that it will take work on my part to guide her, but I can already see the positive aspects coming out.

Some things I love about Audrey (and that I should remember on a more regular basis):

-She makes me laugh. She makes up stories about "beasts" living under her bed and cooking her breakfast in the morning. She sings along to songs in the back seat of the car (I just wanna be OK, be OK, be OK, I just wanna be a candy cane), she names her babies things like, George, Doris, Cake-uh (she really loves cake), Chunk, and Mawdikuh (after Monica on Friends). She talks everyday on her fake phone to a little old lady named Phyllis from church.

-She's smart. She picks up on things so quickly, it amazes me. She can recognize all of her letters, and write some of them. Recently she was also able to recognize some words that Justin spelled to her (cat and mom). She says multi-syllabic words in context (most of the time). She can draw people with eyes, mouths, hair, bodies, arms, legs, feet, etc. I really have no idea how she knows these things. I work with her a little but, but many of these things have been completely surprising to us.

-She amazes me with her empathy. Even from a really young age, she has genuinely cared about others. If someone is crying, she cries. If someone is upset, she offers her blanky to them. She seems to pick out the one little old person at the store who really needed a smile and waves to them. This is uncharacteristic for her because she is fairly shy the rest of the time.

-She performs feats that should make me cringe, but as I watch her climb a six foot fence by herself the first time, or learn to ride her scooter, or jump off of whatever rock/bench/curb she finds, I can't help but feel a surge of pride. It's kind of crazy, but I know that's who she is. And it's a little bit who I am, so I love that I can (within reason, and under supervision) allow her to explore the world in her own crazy way.

It's been a tough...well, three years if I'm being honest, but every day is an adventure with Audrey, and I don't think I would know what to do if she was an "easy" child.

"You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any."

Bill Cosby

Three.

2010-11-02T23:54:00.000-07:00

Is it bad when an hour spent sitting in a doctor's office reading old magazines feels like a vacation? Just an hour alone with my iPod and old issues of People magazine? No one demanding anything from me. Nothing being thrown at my head. No screaming. No crying. No spilled juice on the carpet. No repeating the same warning to stop tormenting the poor cat for the fifteenth time...

Then again, what would my life be like without those things? Pretty dang boring, I'd say.

Wow...I'm back.

2010-10-15T23:18:00.000-07:00

Okay. I had this big, long post started and then I got a little bit ADD...basically, I've been in a funk lately and I wanted to make a list (shocker, I know), of things that make me happy. I mean, why not. That's sort of my thing, is it not?

Fall: Crunchy leaves, apples, the smell of apple pie (not the taste), baking, the crispness of the mornings, hats, scarves, gloves, the colors, and taking pictures of Audrey in the leaves.
Jack Johnson at the Gorge: Oh man. Minus the uh, secondhand smoke, it was amazing.
Rediscovering old music: I've been re-importing all of my music since my computer crashed and lost it all...it's been a fun trip back to my younger days.
Speaking of computers...we got an iMac: Oooh. Where have you been all my life, iMac?
Ballet: I've been doing ballet. Yep. It's amazingly difficult and fun. Leotard, tights, and all.
Watching Audrey do ballet: Three and four-year-olds doing ballet? Cutest thing you've ever seen. I promise.
Watching Volleyball: I almost don't want to admit this since I've spent a lot of time making fun of it. It's really fun to watch...I mean, I watched an undefeated college team, so maybe I'm biased. I don't know. It was fun. Spanx and all...haha.
My friends: They are all amazing. Each and every one in different ways. I love them.
New friends: I love it when I really connect with someone new. The moment when you know you just met someone who you'll be friends with for a long time to come.
Hip Hop: I wish some of it was a little cleaner in the lyric department, but I just can't get enough of those beats!
Skyping: I'm a little late on this phenomenon since we never really had a webcam until now. I love it. It's funny.
Swimming: I forget how good it feels until I finally do it again. Oh man. It's so relaxing.
Hockey: One month until the season starts.
Being spontaneous: It's harder now with a three-year-old, but I love the feeling when I'm able to just decide to do something and then do it on a whim.
Cover songs: I don't know what it is. I love a good cover. Heck, I love a bad cover.
The fact that Justin rides a motorcycle: He's so awesome. It makes me feel a little rebellious to ride on the back of his motorcycle...
Snuggling: With Justin, with my friends, with Audrey (when she'll let me)...I just love it.
Belting out worship songs in the car: Nothing better.
Being able to breathe: I haven't been able to breathe properly without coughing for over a month now...I kind of miss it.
Laughing out loud after reading a text: I know this sounds like a facebook 'like', but it's funny when this happens because then I kind of feel like an idiot. And that makes me laugh more.
Audrey's drawings: She is three and can already draw a whole person. Head, legs, arms, body, everything. Her people sort of resemble Tim Burton characters, but that just makes it better. I'm so happy that she seems to have inherited the artist gene from me:)
Hearing Audrey sing along to songs in the back seat. Best thing ever. She just makes up her own words.
And...there are many more...

Aaaah...Spring.

2010-04-19T21:33:00.001-07:00

After all the whining about the weather in the last post, I must say, I am so thankful for the wonderful spring weather we're having now. Audrey, Joon (our new puppy), and I went for an evening walk to the park today and it was just beautiful out. It made me really yearn for summer! Hopefully it stays warm until then!

On a similar note, since it's been so nice outside lately, we've been able to pretty much finish all of the work we've been doing on our backyard. Someday maybe I'll post before and after pictures, but it's not quite finished yet. When we moved in, everything was just overgrown and full of weeds. We spent all last spring and summer tearing out stumps (by hand), pulling weeds, trimming hedges, and landscaping. This year we built a raised vegetable garden and rocked in an area along our fence to keep the weeds down. It's starting to look really nice and we're excited to start having barbecues and bonfires (or you know, little fires in our fire pit).

I'm just very happy right now. Things are going well for us. I'm just amazed more and more each day at the things God has provided for us. Especially the things we never asked for or thought of for ourselves.

I've been blessed with a new job at the Soap Lake School district as a Para Pro sub. I had originally interview for another position at the elementary school, but was turned down in favor of someone with a little more experience. At first I was pretty disappointed, but the principal actually called me and let me know that he still really wanted me to come work at the school as a sub. Honestly, this has worked out much better than if I would have gotten that other position. This way I don't have to find a daycare for Audrey right away and I'm still free to stay home with her most days. Also, if I would have gotten that position, I wouldn't have been able to help teach the lifeguarding classes this year, which is something I love. It's amazing what can happen when I actually hand everything over to God. I've decided that I'm not going to worry about where I will work or what my career will be because God already knows. He has something perfect for me. It's been nice not worrying about that.

So, I'll be subbing tomorrow for the first time, and I'm a little nervous but mostly excited. I've met most of the Para Pros already, and I really got along with all of them! I also know probably a third of the kids at the school because they used to go to the after school bible club at my church. I got about fifty hugs when I was there and it was a nice feeling to see that I made some sort of impact on those kids.

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen."

--Ephesians 3:20, 21

"She's Just Waitin' for the Summertime, When the Weather's Fine..."

2010-04-07T22:52:00.001-07:00

Is it just me, or was the weather better in January? I don't know what the deal is, but all this cold and rain and wind is really starting to bum me out! I keep thinking, "I should totally go on a bike ride/walk/run/exercise of some kind!", and then I look outside and see the storm clouds blowing in. Which makes me want to snuggle under a blanket and eat chocolate. A lot of chocolate. I think I may have a deficiency of some sort.

I was feeling pretty good for about week while I taught a lifeguarding class. That's always a good diet and exercise plan for me because not only am I swimming a lot, I'm only able to squeeze in small, healthy snacks throughout the day. Perfect! Only, that lasts about a week and then the class is over and I'm back to eating chocolate again...

I'm just very black and white when it comes to weather. I've never been a big fan of Spring really. Unless it's Spring in Seattle. Spring in Seattle is amazing. The weather is pretty much perfect and usually the rain comes at less frequent intervals. I should have a Spring home there. I think I'm going to work on that. I mean, Spring here can be pretty amazing too, but lately it's been more like a drawn out winter. It's exciting seeing all of the new flowers and plants that start popping up, but I'm not a fan of this unpredictable weather. I pretty much like it hot or cold. Not a whole lot in between. I just want to be able to plant my garden and not fear frost and snow in the middle of April!

It's hard with Audrey too because we're stuck in the house on cold, wet days. We all just get along much better when we can get out and exercise! Maybe I just need to get her some rain boots. I don't know.

So, here's hoping that old man winter takes the next train out of town. I'm blaming him for my chocolate consumption. Maybe that Easter bunny too...

"The wave is comin' but I ain't got no fear..."

2010-03-28T23:18:00.000-07:00

2010 is shaping up to be a very good year and it's only March. Wait...what? March is almost over? How did that happen? We've been so busy, the months have been flying by. Sometimes I wish things would slow down (and they will soon), but for the most part I've actually been enjoying all of the activity. Last year I felt like I was in a rut. I wasn't depressed, but I just didn't feel well and spiritually I was sort of stagnant I guess. I think the two usually go hand in hand. I've made some changes recently that have greatly improved my outlook and overall health. I've realized (again) that when I let God take control, my situation and outlook improve exponentially. I'm still baffled as to why I forget that so easily. One would think that after 25 years something would sink in and stick in my little brain. One would think.

I'm just thankful that He not only provides me with life, but He allows me to experience all of the little things that I love. I'm amazed that the One who created the Universe also cares about the minute details of my life. The only reason I can even enjoy any of the sports and activities that I do is because God made me that way. That has been an amazing revelation in my life. Not that I didn't know that intellectually, but I'm realizing it in a different way. He cares enough about me to allow me to experience things I love even when they don't really seem to matter in the grand scheme of things.

I guess I'm getting a little more philosophical than I originally planned, but really. I've had some amazing opportunities lately, and a lot of them were things that I never thought I would get to do. Some were things that seemed like good ideas, but I had no real plan about how to make them happen. Some were on my "bucket list". And some were just things that I just never expected to be as enjoyable as they were.

The past three months have been so busy. We've travelled around the state more than we have in a long time. There has been maybe two weekends that we were just at home. I just want to list some of the things we have had the opportunity to do lately because I'm so thankful for the provisions God has made for our family and for the wonderful experiences I have been given.

I participated in a book club. This was something I never thought I would do, or be interested in doing, but it was really fun. We chose some pretty good books. Our group was made up of about eight women and we all really get along well and have really good discussions. I've been blessed with some really great friends in the area.
I have played in two all-women's hockey tournaments with teams made up of people I had never met before.
I joined a strings group at church. I play the guitar, and we also have a mandolin, two hammer dulcimers, a bass, two auto harps, and a banjo.
I had the opportunity to play my guitar with the strings group at church in front of actual people. I have never, ever done anything close to that and it's something I have wanted to do for as long as I have played the guitar. Which is a long time.
I was summoned and ended up being chosen as an alternate juror on a wrongful death suit. This was such an interesting experience for me. The case was really interesting and I loved watching the whole courtroom scene unfold. It wasn't exactly like the movies, but it wasn't too far off either. It's definitely something I would like to experience again.
One of the hockey tournaments I was invited to play in was against the EWU women's hockey team. It was amazing! I loved it! They played a really rough game (and remember, I play with all guys usually), but it was still fun. One of the girls playing on my team happened to be someone who I went to high school with and hadn't seen since maybe junior year. It was fun catching up with her. It was just an amazing experience to play against an actual college team. Especially since I've only played for about two seasons.
I completed my second season as a hockey player with nine goals (just one shy of my goal for the year) and four assists. I basically tripled my goal amount from last season, which was exciting! I felt that I really improved some of my skills this season and I had a lot of fun getting to know all the guys who play.
I'm teaching my fourth lifeguarding class right now in Moses Lake. I love it! It can be really stressful and exhausting, but I love teaching people and helping them succeed at something that it so challenging. It's a really fun group of people this time and I'm really enjoying it.

One of the best parts of the past three months (or even the past year) happened last weekend. I was able to go spend the weekend in Seattle with my best friend for her birthday. When I got there I was able to visit with some of the people I had met when we lived there, but hadn't seen in close to three years. The last time most of them had seen me I was about nine months pregnant. We had a great time catching up and just being silly and crazy. After that we went to see the cherry blossoms in bloom at UW. It was my first time seeing them, and it was really pretty. The whole campus is pretty, but the blossoms make it that much better. It sort of makes me wish I would have gone there for college. After we had our fill of cherry blossoms and people watching on the quad, we headed downtown to see the Bodies Exhibition. The last time this exhibit was in Seattle, I was pregnant and I wasn't sure if I would have been able to handle something like that. I'm glad it came back and that I finally decided to go! It was fascinating! We both thoroughly enjoyed it. It just really made me appreciate what God has created. Everything about us is intricate. There is no way any of it could have happened by accident.

The next day we got up early(ish) and headed to Ocean Shores with another friend to go surfing. I have wanted to go surfing for as long as I can remember. Seriously. It was definately on my "bucket list". I can't even explain how much I love the ocean and I knew I would love surfing. We had a fun time driving the two-and-a-half hours to the beach. It was like a mini road trip. When we got there it was overcast and cold (as usual), which I expected. What I didn't expect was the wind, but we were determined to surf. And that we did. I surfed until my hands went numb from the cold and then surfed a little more. It was amazing. It was even better than I expected (minus the cold). I was able to stand up on my first try and then by the end I was able to ride the waves for a little ways. When we were finished and took our gear back to the surf shack, the old, crusty surfer dude told us we were hardcore and that we probably couldn't have picked a worse day to surf. We took that as a compliment. It can only get better from there. It's definately something I would like to do again. And again.

I was just thankful for that whole weekend. First of all, I have a husband who realizes when I need a break from the day to day monotony that comes with being a stay-at-home mom. I know not everyone has someone who they can count on like that. It's really great because I've been getting overwhelmed with Audrey's "terrible twos" lately. She's usually pretty good. I've learned to handle her strong will, but lately she's been going through some really stubborn stages. I can handle it about 95 percent of the time, but the other 5 percent can really make me want to rip my hair out. I love that Justin can sense that and will stay with Audrey while I go recharge.

I'm also thankful for the time my friend and I got to spend. At a time when we could have easily grown apart, our friendship has become stronger than ever. It was nice to just go have fun and let go. It's been awhile since we've been able to do that. I've also gotten to know some other great people who she introduced me to when we lived in Seattle, and it's been great hanging out with them.

Hello, Seattle, I am the Crescent Moon

2010-02-09T00:56:00.000-08:00

We just had a fabulous weekend in Seattle. It was nice to get away from the dreary, rainy weather over here to the sunny, warm weather over on the western side of the state. Wait. Shouldn't that be the other way around? Well, one would think. It's true though. There was actual sun in Seattle. Gasp! The sun occasionally peaks through the clouds and when it does, it's probably one of my favorite things. It's beautiful and it makes me really miss living there.

On Saturday we met my friend for lunch at Justin's favorite teryaki place, and when I say place, I really mean hole-in-the-wall. It really is good though. After that we headed to Greenlake and walked around and learned that rollerblading is making a comeback. People of all ages were just rollerblading around like it was 1995. It was fantastic.

Later we all met another friend and headed to Everett to watch the Spokane Chiefs play the Silvertips. Our seats were six rows up and slightly to the right of center ice. Uh-may-zing. We were just about the only Chiefs fans there, and of course Justin, Audrey, and I wore our jerseys. It was kind of fun. Random guys kept coming up to us and half-whispering, "Go Chiefs!". It was like being part of a secret club or something. The game was really good even though Spokane lost. The worst part was when the Silvertips scored and they blew this ridiculously loud train whistle like four times. They scored five goals, so that's like twenty earsplitting whistles. By the end Audrey was looking around all wild-eyed and holding her hands over her ears. I felt bad about that, but she still loved the game.

After the game we parted ways with our friends and headed back to the hotel. Audrey had been looking forward to "fwimming" for about a week, so we made our way down to the pool. She had a lot of fun and I got her to jump in and go under water, which was impressive. I don't think she would have cared what we did to her as long as it didn't involve train whistles. She's still talking about how the train was yelling at her.

The next day we just wandered around Seattle Center since our hotel was only a couple blocks away. After that we headed back over the mountains. The worst part of the trip happened when our car got sideswiped in North Bend. We had stopped to walk around at the outlet mall and when we got ready to leave we noticed that our car had gotten hit. No note or anything. We did notice that the car parked one space away had front-end damage remarkably similar to the damage on our car, so we call the police. They came and checked it out and determined that it "probably" wasn't that car because it would have bent the wheel rim and the molding. Really? You know for sure that it would have done that even though you have no idea how they hit us or if they stopped before they scraped the molding or whatever? Justin wasn't so sure either since there was blue paint transfer on their car and silver paint transfer on ours. Also, the measurements of all of the scrapes and dents matched the ones on the other car.

Anyway, it was all very frustrating and ends with us having to use the majority of our tax return to fix something that someone else caused and was too chicken to fess up to. I guess we can be thankful that it happened at a time that we were expecting our refund. It's just frustrating since we've had similar things happen to every vehicle we've owned. Maybe it's God telling us not to put so much pride in possessions. I just have to think of it that way. In the end all of this doesn't matter. I mean, at least we have a car and money to pay for the damages. We could have gotten our car stolen in Seattle or we could have gotten into a wreck. I just need to remember to put things in perspective.

So, basically we had a great weekend minus the fender bender. It would take a whole lot more than a dent in the car to ruin a good weekend in Seattle.

"My wife and I just prefer Seattle. It's a beautiful city. Great setting. You open your front door in the morning and the air smells like pine and the sea, as opposed to bus exhaust"

--Ron Reagan

Resolutions?

2010-01-05T10:48:00.000-08:00

I've never been one to make New Year's Resolutions mostly because I'll forget about them a week or so into the new year. I love making lists though, so here's a breakdown of my goals for this new year (in no particular order):

1. Get into shape. This one's sort of cliche as far as resolutions go, but I do need to be a little more deliberate in my efforts to stay healthy and strong. This past spring I was playing hockey once a week, biking two to three times a week, and swimming at least once a week. I felt good. Now I play hockey twice a week...and that's about it. I need to step it up.

2. Play my guitar. I was doing well for a couple of months but I got busy over the holidays and sort of stopped.

3. Read my bible every day and journal more. I'm hoping to read through the bible again this year.

4. Complete some sort of wall hanging for our dining room. I have some ideas bouncing around in my head, but I need to make the time to actually do it.

5. Scrapbook more. I need to finish Audrey's first and second year. It's a big task, but I really want to be done with it.

6. Decorate Audrey's room. I'm planning to repaint her room purple and add some original wall art and some shelving for more storage.

7. Score at least six more goals before hockey season is over. I have four so far.

8. Teach Audrey her ABCs. She can repeat them after me and she can identify most letters but she hasn't been able to say them all in a row yet. We practice off and on, but I want to be more consistent in spending that time with her.

9. Finish working on our backyard improvements. We still want to make a raised vegetable garden, put brick edging along our side yard, and fill it in with rocks. It was amazing to see the transformation last year, and I'm excited for this year.

10. Make more art. Whatever it happens to be, I need to use that talent I've been blessed with before I lose it altogether.

11. Keep in touch with friends and family on a more regular basis. Not via facebook, but with actual phone calls, letters/cards, and visits.

12. Continue to organize and declutter our lives. I feel so much better when I get rid of all of the extra stuff we never use.

13. Run more. I know I already made a goal to get into shape, but running is a whole different category for me. I hate it, but I want to be able to do it. I have to be careful because my knees are steadily losing cartilege, but I know if I stretch adequately I can do it. I ran a two mile fun run in 20 degree weather last month and felt great, so I am pretty motivated to get out there.

14. Be an example to those around me. I've been really making an effort (okay, more like God has been working in me) to be more of a positive influence on those around me. There's so much negativity in the world that a little kindness and compassion go a long way.

"It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining in an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinately being just an ordinary decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad."

--C.S. Lewis

Silver and Gold

2009-10-15T00:29:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a lot about friendship recently. I have always been blessed with great friends no matter what my situation happens to be. I'm actually amazed sometimes (though I really shouldn't be at this point) at how God places just the right person in my life at just the right time, and though I may not see it at the time, they always serve some sort of purpose. I guess that may be sort of obvious, but sometimes I just don't see the big picture.

Recently I've begun to come to terms with the fact that friends, even those who are really close, eventually drift apart whether emotionally or geographically. It's an inevitable part of life, but that doesn't necessarily make it any easier. I struggled for a long time with the fact that I may never live near my best friends and that eventually we would only see each other on holidays, and then maybe once a year, and then maybe...I don't know. I didn't get that far because I didn't want to think about it.

What I've realized is that there will always be people who drift in and out of my life. Some will be around for awhile, others only a short time. Some of my closest friendships have lasted less than three years, some more than 20. Almost all of my closest friends live at least 100 miles away. Many live much farther away than that. At the end of the day, the friendships that truly count are with people who, no matter how much time has passed, can strike up the same old conversation without missing a beat. It's always comfortable, never awkward. There's no rehashing of old wrongs, or any drama. Just two (or more) people who God chose to bring together.

The reason I brought up this subject is that one of my best friends just returned from her LDS mission in Argentina. She was gone for 18 months, which seemed like a lifetime for two people who spent nearly every day together for at least four summers. It was a long time, but not as unbearable as I had imagined. The worst times were right after she left and the last few weeks before she returned. I worried that things wouldn't be the same and that maybe we wouldn't be as close as we were before. Eighteen months is a long time to go without talking to someone. It's always when I'm expecting the worst when I am pleasantly surprised by something better. As soon as she walked in the door, it was like she never left. Right now I'm having a hard time believing she was even gone except that she knows a lot of Spanish and has pictures to prove she was in Argentina!

I love how God blesses me in so many little ways. He proves to me time and time again that even the little details of my life matter to Him. I tend to have a hard time believing that sometimes, and I really shouldn't because I'm continually being proven wrong.

I'm thankful to each and every one of you out there who I am privileged enough to call my friend. You are all amazing. The end. :)

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, "What! You too? I thought I was the only one!"

--C.S. Lewis

Anticipation

2009-09-15T17:09:00.000-07:00

Some things I'm looking forward to:

1. Taco(less) Tuesday -Basically it's a young adults bible study. We used to have tacos, but now we have muffins and biscotti. Either way, it's a really good time. Good friends. Good music. Great fellowship. You should come. Really.

2. Megan's Return - She's coming home from her mission in Argentina in less than a month. I'm so excited...and I just can't hide it... It seems like it's been FOR-EV-VER since I saw her last! I mean, Audrey wasn't even walking when she left and now she can say her name (well, mostly she says "Bacon" or something, but still). I know things will be a little different (how could they not be?), but I'm excited to see how we've each grown in our lives.

3. Fall - I love fall. I love the way the leaves crunch, the smell of frost, pumpkins, apples, cinnamon, wearing scarves and mittens, crocheting (why yes, I am an old lady), the colors...mmm. Oh, and caramel chocolate apples. With macadamia nuts sprinkled on top...

4. Hockey Season - Justin and I are joining the Moses Lake Coyotes this year! Last year we played drop-in and went to clinics, so now we're ready to play in actual games...maybe...he is at least. Anyway, I'm really excited to get back on the ice. It's so fun and it's a great workout! Seriously, if you ever want to burn like 1400 calories in two hours, come play hockey. I never thought I could break a sweat when it was below zero, but it is possible. Plus, it's really fun to put on all the ridiculous gear and run into people.

5. Snowboarding - That's sort of a given. I'm just hoping that we can go more than twice this year. Also, it would be nice not to get stuck on the lift when it's -22 degrees with wind chill. At night. Seriously. I thought I was going to lose an appendage. My friend and I actually started to cry our toes hurt so bad. Good times.

Audrey...

2009-07-29T08:07:00.000-07:00

Today she is two, and although it feels impossible that two whole years have passed, sometimes it seems as though a decade has gone by. I still have not figured out how time can go by so quickly while simultaneously standing still. She is no longer a baby, and hasn't been for some time, but I've only just begun to notice all of the changes in her small body. Where she once had creases and rolls from baby fat, she now possesses ankles and elbows and knees. Her face looks the same but completely different at the same time. The thick, black hair that covered her head is now nearly blond and falls to the middle of her back. Her blue eyes are the only feature that has remained the same.

The past two years have been much, much harder than they have been easy. I won't sugarcoat anything and pretend that her and I have not had struggles Every. Single. Day. From the moment I first realized that there was something more to the nausea I had been feeling every day for a week, I knew I was in for a challenge. Even her entrance into the world, though without complication, was like a power struggle. From her unwillingness to make her appearance until the last possible second before surgical intervention, and my unwillingness to back down or give up, I knew that we would always challenge each other.

When I truly think about it, I know I wouldn't have it any other way. There are things I would possibly change given the chance, but the experience I've had in this adventure called parenting has forced me to grow and change. God knew that I needed a challenge. That I wouldn't rise to my full potential unless I was driven nearly to my breaking point. I'm never truly satisfied with myself unless I am forced to push my limits, and I hadn't fully realized that about myself until Audrey came along.

All of the struggles and challenges have made the accomplishments that much better. When she has a good day or is particularly cute or sweet, I am able to really and truly appreciate it and not take it for granted.

She is amazingly sweet when she wants to be, and I think that she will grow to be someone who genuinely cares about others. She gets upset if she sees another child crying in the store and often tries to offer them her blankie (even if the kid is four aisles down). She never fails to wave or smile at little old ladies in the store, and she seems to know which ones need just a little extra lift that day. The amazing thing about that is the fact that she really doesn't give up smiles easily to strangers. She is very cautious in new situations and she likes to sit back and take everything in before fully engaging herself.

From the moment she was born, she has been a very active baby. She hit many of the physical milestones like rolling over, crawling, and walking much earlier than most babies her age, and she has continued that trend as a toddler. She runs, jumps, and climbs all over anything that will stay still enough, and she does it with ease. She can somersault, jump nearly a foot in the air with both feet together, and basically anything else that could make a mother cringe. I am amazed daily at the things that she is able to do with her little body.

Her vocabulary increases every day and she is really starting to understand what we say to her and communicate her needs to us. She loves to talk on her toy cellphone and will have a whole conversation with her cousin Toby or Grandma. Her favorite color right now is purple and she goes around pointing at all the "puhple" things. If I go through each letter of the alphabet, she is able to repeat them, and she can "count" to ten ("one, tooos, fiiive, nine, ten!").

I would have never guessed how much things could change after having a baby, but now I can't imagine my life any other way.

So, happy 2nd birthday Audrey Suzanne!

I plan to put links to my pregnancy and birth stories to this post mostly so that I can remember, but also for anyone who would like to read them. I will hopefully finish them soon.

Summertime and the Livin' is...Busy

2009-06-29T07:54:00.000-07:00

Well, apparently blogging is not my forte (but really, did anyone say it was?).

Anyway. I got incredibly busy towards the middle of May (it's the end of July already! Wha!??)and things have just started slowing down. I am working at the pool yet again this year, mostly because it's convenient and I can pretty much make my own hours. Since I have decided to stay home with Audrey as much as possible until she's old enough to go to preschool/school, it works out perfectly. Plus, there's a little part inside of me that, as much as I hate to admit it, still loves that place. We've always been blessed with a core group of returning lifeguards who make it a fun place to work. Some of us have been there since the beginning (seven years!?) and have experienced things together that no 16-18 year old should ever have to go though. We'll be forever bonded in some way by those experiences, as sappy as that sounds.

So here's the part where I make a long boring list of things I've been up to because I'm too lazy to actually write about them...Ahem...here we go...

Toward the middle of May I was getting ready to teach the annual week-long Lifeguarding class at the pool. I was completely in charge this year, so I had to come up with a lesson plan, find other lifeguards to help teach, and supervise the lifeguards who were gaining instructor certification. It was a lot of work, but I had a ton of fun teaching.

I was a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding on June 13. It was an evening ceremony right near the bank of the Columbia river. We stayed in a huge condo, played volleyball with the rest of the wedding party, danced the night away, and best of all, Justin and I had a whole weekend away from Audrey. It was nice. We've only been away from her overnight three times since she was born. It was due time.

On Sunday, Justin and I participated in our first triathlon. It was a lot harder than I had expected, but it was totally worth it. The swim was harder than I thought it would be, especially since I'd been swimming at least 1000 yards a day leading up to the race. I ended up making pretty decent time though, and I didn't need to hail a lifeguard, which was a plus. The bike was hard mostly because there was no time to catch my breath between swimming and pedaling up the first hill. The run was the one thing that didn't surprise me. I knew it would be hard because I hate running, and it was. I felt pretty good though because I beat Justin on the swim and bike by about three minutes each. He caught up with me on the run and ended up beating me by about five minutes, but I expected that. My final time was one hour and 49 minutes, which isn't bad, but I can definately improve. The most humbling part of the whole thing was watching people finish the entire race while I was just finishing the bike ride. I'm definately considering doing it again. Maybe next time I'll actually train for more than a month...
Audrey is turning two in exactly a week (how is that possible??) and I've been busy planning her party. I'm planning to make a layered "Mad Hatter" cake. I've never made a layer cake in my life, let alone a fancy one, but hopefully it works out. I've been a little stressed out because we're expected about 20 people and we've never really entertained for that many at once. I know it will be fun for Audrey though.
We're also getting ready to go camping next month in Idaho. This will be Audrey's first camping trip and I'm getting a little nervous about her sleeping habits. I have a feeling we won't be getting much sleep that week. We're pretty excited to finally use all of the camping stuff we got for our wedding though. Now that it's been four years....

Well, my attention span is waning...until next time...

Hockey, Triathlons, Seattle...Oh MY!

2009-05-01T13:28:00.000-07:00

Well folks, time for another list...I've been away too long, so I'll just recap what has been going on for the past few weeks...

I'm playing hockey in a co-ed Spring League in Wenatchee. There is one other female besides me on the team, which makes it interesting. So far I've score two goals and had one (really awesome) assist. We've won three out of the four games that we've played so far.

Justin and I have been biking and running a lot lately in preparation for the triathlon we are participating in this July. We've ridden up Beezely hill about three times so far, which is a record for me. Usually I get up there about once a season. I had a pretty good crash last week on the way down and another small crash last night, but all of my body parts seem to be in working order, so I think I'll live.

My birthday was on the 27th of April (I'm a quarter of a century old!) and Justin, Audrey, and I took a trip to Seattle for a few days to celebrate. We went to Woodland Park Zoo, Carkeek Park, Seattle Center, rode the Monorail (for the first time), Pike Place Market, the Pier, and the Northgate Mall. I really miss living in Seattle, but I really don't miss the traffic. I've gotten used to the slow pace of Eastern Washington again and I forgot how long it takes to get anywhere in Seattle.

Justin got me a Spokane Chiefs hockey jersey for my birthday! I'm so excited! Too bad hockey season is over, because now I have to think of ridiculous excuses to wear a jersey in the middle of summer...

Justin and I (along with his mom and two other ladies) have entered ourselves in the Eagles Ironman Challenge. Basically, it's an Ironman triathlon spread out over three weeks. Our team must complete 2.4 miles of swimming, 112 miles of biking, and 26.2 miles of running/walking. It should be a great motivator to get out and train, but it seems a little daunting at this point. The competition officially starts tomorrow (it coincides with Bloomsday) and ends on May 22.

I got offered a job recently, and I really don't want to go into detail right now, but I'm pretty excited. It would be a full time position, but with flexible hours. Oh, and fairly decent pay too. Anyway, keep me in your prayers.

And that's about all I have to say about that. Until next time...

Happy Easter!

2009-04-12T22:03:00.000-07:00

Audrey last Easter (8 months old)

This Easter (19 months old)

"Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but is RISEN!"

--Luke 24:5

3K, Shmee Kay

2009-03-31T20:00:00.000-07:00

Yep. Not gonna lie. I definitely have a case of the old lady legs today. This is due in part to my decision to neglect stretching before my run/walk/crawl yesterday. Okay, I didn't really crawl, but at the rate I was going, it probably looked as though I was standing still. I'm also thinking that maybe the fact that I haven't gone for a run in over two years might have a little bit to do with my creakiness. Just maybe. I did participate in a fun run (sooo not fun) last summer, for which I did absolutely no training, but I don't really think that counts. I thought that since Justin and I were only going to do the 3K distance, I didn't really need to train. I mean, I can so run a mile. I did, and I also got second place, which sounds good until I tell you that I ran a ten-minute mile. Yeah. I think that all of the good runners opted for the 5K. I was a little sore after that race too. Okay, a lot sore. I think I may have pulled my heel muscles? Maybe my Achilles tendon? I don't know. All I do know is that I was sore for at least a couple of weeks afterwards. I won't be doing that again.

But back to my run yesterday. I figured that since I was going to start off with a brisk walk for a couple of blocks that maybe that would be all the warm-up my legs would need. Apparently not. Overall though, I'm feeling pretty good about myself. I wasn't nearly as out of shape as I imagined I would be, and at one point during the run I almost felt good. Almost. I am definitely not having any heel issues this time, so I think the walking thing helped. I also just realized that yesterday was the first time I've really gone out for a run by myself. Whenever I've gone running before, it's been for a sport or I've gone with a friend. I guess this was the first time that I've been able to just go along at my own pace (read: oooold lady*). It was not entirely unpleasant is all I'm saying. I'm certainly not dreading my next run, although it may be a couple of days.

Tomorrow I am going swimming with a friend of mine who is training for the same triathlon as I am. We swam 1000 yards on Saturday, and hopefully we can surpass that tomorrow. I love swimming. I think that maybe the feeling I get while swimming is similar to a runner's high. After I reach a certain point in my swim, I feel like I could just keep swimming forever. It's so relaxing and so much less painful than running.

Anyway, here are my training stats so far, just in case you were dying to know:

Swimming: 2000 yds

Biking: 3 miles

Running: 2 miles

For the triathlon, which is a sprint distance, I have to be able to swim a half-mile (approximately 35 laps/875 yards), bike 12 miles, and run about 3.1 miles. At this point I think I could totally bust out the swimming and biking no problem, but I want to really improve my skills. When I bike (if the wind ever stops), I haul Audrey in a little trailer behind me, which adds a little bit of resistance (uh like 40 pounds). I figure that this can only help add to my speed when I bike without her. When I swim I've been really focusing on my technique so that I can be as efficient as possible. I think this will become important when I'm swimming in open water, which I've never done before...to tell you the truth, the only thing I'm really afraid of is running into a dead fish or some stray seaweed (lake weed?). I'm totally creeped out by underwater things, and I'm not even talking sharks or, you know, giant squid. Just seaweed. Eww...I'm cringing just thinking about it.

So, there's that.

* Phoebe: "Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords, umm, but I... I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. So then, this is, "Bear Claw." Okay, umm, "Turkey Leg" and... "Ooold Lady."

--FRIENDS

And to make a boring post a little more interesting, here is Audrey and a glimpse into what my life is like on a daily basis. It's cute things like this that save her on a daily basis from being tossed out into the garden with the cat.

Ooh, You're as Cold as Ice

2009-03-24T23:56:00.000-07:00

I just swam 1000 yards (40 laps) this evening with one of my good friends. It was my first time in the pool since September, and I felt just a little out of shape and creaky at first. The thing about swimming is that even though it may be hard at first, I always feel so relaxed and accomplished afterwards. Especially when I find out that I can still do the butterfly. Sort of.

I've wanted to participate in a triathlon for a couple of years now, but I've never quite gotten around to actually doing one. Oh, and just so you know, I'm not talking Ironman or anything, just a sprint distance. I'm not that crazy. Yet. So, this year I've decided that it's high time I actually make the time to train and enter a triathlon. I know that I can do it, I mean, the swimming will be fairly easy, as will the biking. It's the running that I dread. I hate running. I think there is only one time in my life that I have run more than a mile at a time. I need to be able to run three miles for the race. Boo.

So far I've biked once (3 miles, with chubby baby/trailer in tow) and swam once. Or swum. Swum is not a word...is it? Anyway, my lack of excercise has a little more to do with the weather around here than my lack of discipline. Or so I say...It really has been pretty cold lately; too cold for a toddler to ride in a bike trailer anyway. Here's hoping the weather will change so that I can start running. Ugh.

And that's all I have to say about that. I'm off to watch me some Johnny Depp (Nick of Time, circa 1995? It's decent so far, but what Johnny Depp film isn't?)

Update! With Pictures!

2009-03-17T21:25:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling a little lazy today, so I'm going to update via bullet notes. I hope you don't mind. If you do, too bad, I'm using the bullets anyway.

Each week I attend "Girl's Night" with various friends, and the theme this week was Rock Band. By rock band, I mean, like with actual instruments. The guitars even had strings and everything. I know that's a little old fashioned nowdays, what with that Wii those darned kids are always talking about, but anyway...we all got together and played instruments and it was really fun. My nephew, Toby, kept telling us to play "superloud!", which reminded me of some sort of Japanese cartoon. The only thing we were missing was a dirty, old garage. And a crazy drummer.

On Saturday I packed up my hockey gear and headed to Wenatchee for the St. Hat-Trick's Day tournament. I was a little nervous because I'm fairly new to hockey and I was placed on a team with a bunch of people I'd never met in my life. Also, when I got there, the arena was inundated with senior citizens (and other people, I don't want to be an ageist or anything) and none of them were weilding hockey sticks. Apparently there was also a home show going on in the arena. When I finally figured out where to go, I met with my team and started warming up. It was nice to already be fairly warm to begin with since I'm used to playing in sub-freezing temperatures in Moses Lake (seriously, one night is was about -7 degrees with the wind chill). It was also great to be one of six women, SIX! There are two women who play in Moses Lake, and I am one of them. To wrap this up (because I'm even boring myself)--We lost all three games, but not by more than one or two points each. My teammates were really fun and encouraging even though I had never played in an actual game before. I almost scored about four times (I know, horsehoes, hand grenades) Our captain (and woman in charge of the women's team in Wenatchee) told me a made a "FANTASTIC" forward. That was nice.

Audrey has been sick with some kind of phlemmy, coughy junk for over a week now, but save for one day when she had a fever, she's been pretty much the same energetic/spastic/tazmanian devil baby as usual. I decided to take her to the doctor yesterday though, because her cough was morphing into some kind of miniature smoker's cough that would wake her up at night. I'm pretty glad I took her in when I did because I found out that she has ear infections in both ears! Apparently they just started or something because she hadn't complained of an earache, or maybe she's some kind of super baby. I don't know. So, she's on antibiotics right now. I have to basically pin her to the floor and pry her mouth open to get her to take it, even though she actually does like the taste of it. Explain that one. I mean, once she tastes it, she'll take the whole dose. I guess she just has to keep with tradition and be a crabby patty about everything. Can't you just see the mischief in her eyes?

Sporting her new dress for St. Patrick's Day

My little greenhouse is doing amazing well! I feel like some sort of gardener or something. Let's just ignore the fact that all I did was pour some water on some jiffy pots, plant some seeds, and...uh...yep, that about sums it up. Maybe all those episodes of Gardening with Ciscoe I watched while on bedrest payed off. He's a little goofy (read: A LOT), but he knows his stuff. Well, Ciscoe or not, mah seeds are goin' ta town, yo! It's just too bad I won't ever be able to transplant them since it's still like 37 degrees!

Snap Pea, which looks a little like a four-leaf clover if you squinch up your eyes...

So, that was my weekend. I guess it was better than sitting around watching the X-Files like I usually do. I don't know though, the fourth season is pretty intense. I mean, Scully and Moulder almost kissed once! Aah! (I know. Nerd.)

And one last picture because it makes me laugh really hard. All we did was ask her to bring her coat to us so we could go to the store...two boots, one coat, a scarf and a hat later, we were ready to go.

Dove, sweet dove...

2009-03-13T16:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Justin and I went to Lowe's to look at various landscaping materials such as bricks, plants, bark, and that black plastic sheeting that is supposed to block out weeds (but it never does). I never thought that I would ever be someone who got excited by the Lawn and Garden section, but apparently things changed when I become an old, married, homeowner. Now it's a little bit like going into a really overpriced candy store and I sort of turn into this slack-jawed mouth breather. "Ooh, aren't those paint samples just delicious!" "Oh man, can I just a little bit of that granite counter top? Just a small piece? Pleeeeaaase?" "Drool...."

Anyway, we perused the various shades and shapes of brick edging while Audrey ran around like some sort of miniature landscaper oohing and aahing over each style of paving stone. We eventually made our way inside to browse some of the other departments. I've been trying to find a funky light fixture to replace the old ceiling fan in the dining room, but Lowe's is apparently not the place for funky. Also, Audrey wanted to rid the shelves of all light bulbs, so we started to head towards the register when it happened. I found the meaning of life in Lowe's.

So, Audrey has this scarf that my friend Megan crocheted (does anybody else notice that crocheted looks a little bit like 'crotchety'? I'm just saying) Lately, she's been obsessed with this scarf and she brings it to us every time we're getting ready to go somewhere. Naturally, she was wearing it yesterday while we were strolling around Lowe's. While we were browsing the lighting section, she had taken it off and dropped it, so I picked it up. As I handed it to her she said, "Tate too (thank you) Mommy!", and then seconds later, "I dove ooo (I love you!)". Yeah. She has never said 'I love you' before (or thank you, for that matter without being prompted). Wow. I told you. Meaning of life. In Lowe's.

I guess I won't be shipping her to Guatemala anytime soon after all.

Bite the Bullet

2009-03-10T22:08:00.000-07:00

Audrey has been talking up a storm lately. She actually answers me when I talk to her, which greatly reduces my insanity. Okay, maybe not greatly, but it's so nice not to have a one-sided conversation. Like tonight...

Me: Hey Audrey, do you want to go potty?

Audrey: YEAH! PODDY! Audey poddy!

Me: Okay, sit down on your potty chair.

Audrey: PODDY! Poddy dit (potty sit). Mommy dit. Audey poddy!

Me: Uh...yeah.

She also does this new thing where she squints up her eyes and walks around saying, "Audey?? Aaaauuudeeeey??" which means, "Where's Audrey?", and then inevitably runs into the coffee table/couch/wall/cat/etc.
Last year I bought this little "greenhouse" tray thing so that I could grow some vegetables for our garden. It worked surprisingly well (until the freaking cat opened it up and ate most of the sprouts), so we kept it. On Sunday I planted a few different kinds of seeds in it and put it next to one of the big windows in our house. I looked in it today (Tuesday!) and some of the seeds already sprouted! Maybe I'm the only one that finds that amazing, but seriously? Two days? I didn't even use a grow light! Ha! I wasn't even sure if the seeds were good since most of them were from last year and had been stashed somewhere in the garage through the sub-freezing winter we had this year. Now I just have to make sure it's cat/Audey proof. "Dat Mommy's!" (sticks chubby hand into seed pot). Yep. Thanks.
On Saturday, I will be playing in the St. Hattrick's (Haha...Hat tricks...) Day hockey tournament in Wenatchee. I'm pretty sure I signed up just because of the name, because what kind of person willingly signs up to play THREE hockey games back to back? I'm sort of wondering whether it was such a good idea. I haven't skated in like two weeks, and well, haven't done anything resembling physical activity in a looong time. Unless you count raking. And surfing...the 'net...ha! HA!
Okay, I did go biking with Audrey (she loves her little bike trailer) about a week ago, back when I thought the weather was getting warmer. Now it's back to the 29 degree teaser. Sun, blue skies...snowflakes? Wha? But anyway, biking felt great! I was actually surprised at how in shape I felt. I haven't really been doing anything since I stopped biking last fall, well, except ice skating. Maybe I'm in better shape than I thought. It's just a little depressing because last year I didn't have to do anything and the weight just kept coming off. That's probably the only thing I miss about breastfeeding. I was down to less than my pre-pregnancy size within six months, and even less during the summer. It was glorious! Now? Not so much. It's not that I've gained a lot of weight, I just feel jiggly. I hate that.
Speaking of sizes, it wasn't until last summer that I found out that there is a difference in sizing between junior and women's (misses? I don't know what they're called) sizes. I mean, that sounds like a no-brainer, but I guess I thought the sizes just kept going up. Does that make sense? I knew that dress sizes were always different, but not clothes. Anyway, I found this out because my mother-in-law asked me to be the "model" for her Cabi show. Cabi is like designer clothing, but sold sort of like Pampered Chef, Tupperware, etc...what's that called? I don't know. A home show? So yeah, modeling. Not something that's ever been near a list of my aspirations, but I thought I'd give it a try. She asked me what size I wore so that the lady could bring the right clothes, and I told her size 6-8 depending on the ~~fabric~~ ~~number of molecules in room~~ ~~weather pattern~~ ~~wonky size charting~~ brand. By the way she said, "Really?" over the phone, I automatically assumed that she was implying that she thought I wore a bigger size (yep, I got that all out of one word). As it turns out, she thought just the opposite, and I was outfitted in a size FOUR! So, women's sizes make me feel good. Too bad the selection in the women's section in most stores feature, oh I don't know, cat's on sweaters?
I'm going to do a triathlon this summer. Technically, it's called a sprint triathlon (because I'm soooo not running like 2390 miles. Or six. Whatever), but I'm finally going to do it. I've been meaning to for awhile...but yeah. Then a baby came out of my uterus. I want to do the Danskin in Seattle, but it fills up like the day after registration opens, so that's out for this year. The one I'm doing is in Chelan, which is good because I think I can handle swimming in the lake there. It's clear, and I'm fairly certain that no giant (octopi...octopuses?) cephalopods live there. The swimming part (1/2 mile or 33 pool laps) should be cake, the biking (12 miles, I think) should be somewhat easy (especially when I'm not pulling a chubby toddler behind me), but the running (3 miles)? I don't think I've ever run three miles in row like, ever. Seriously. I HATE running. So, we'll see.
Is that enough? No? Okay, look! Pretty dress! This is the dress that I'm wearing for my best friend's wedding in June! I love it!

Well, I do believe that's enough random trivia for one night. Until next time...

Smooth, like buttah.

2009-02-28T16:30:00.000-08:00

Justin and I FINALLY got the opportunity to get away and go snowboarding today! It was his first and only trip this year and my third, and since we used to go an average of 15 times a season, we were pretty excited. We couldn't have asked for a better day. Blue skies, no crowds, freshly groomed runs, and perfect temperatures. Let me just make a note that the last time I went snowboarding this year it was -22 degrees with the wind chill (Um, hello frozen appendages). So basically, it was 40 degrees warmer today. Downright balmy if you ask me. And I know you didn't.

The only downside to the day was paying $50 a ticket for a half day. Yeah. Luckily Justin's mom had gotten us a mountain money card for Christmas which covered the two tickets (exactly, with none to spare) so we didn't have to pay anything, but still. I asked them for a half day ticket and the ticketing lady informed me that they only sell half day tickets starting at noon. Um? I'm still only going to be here for half of a day. Plus, the half day price is still like $42, so it's not like they would be losing too much money. Last time I checked half of 50 was 25, but I guess things have changed...

Aside from that little bit of ridiculous-ness, we had a really great day. I'm a little sore because apparently I'm a senior citizen, but no broken hips or anything. I even got a sunburn. Yeah. Too bad it's only located on the south half of my face. Mmm...goggle tans...

And here's me, as the kids say, "Butterin' the gnar"...

Viernes

2009-02-26T23:12:00.000-08:00

So, Audrey has hit a new stage. Someone was telling me about how the half-ages are always the worst for kids. I just realized the other day that Audrey is now one and a HALF. She's just been crazy. It's not always a bad kind of crazy, sometimes she's hilarious, but a lot more of the time she makes me want to leave her in the arcade section of Wal-Mart. She probably wouldn't even notice, and she reeeeally likes it there. So much so, that once it was closed and she was so distraught that she stood there shaking the chains like some kind of caged gorilla at the zoo. It was pretty funny until I realized that she was my kid...

She has begun to hit, kick, break, rip, and slam things when she doesn't get her way, and it's been hard to stop her because sometimes it's just so funny when she does it. Sometimes, I said. Once she wanted a treat and proceeded to throw a 15 minute fit because I told her to say please. It should be noted that she does know how to say please and she had also JUST eaten (because she's always eating).

The other day she climbed out of her crib for the first time. The mattress is on the lowest setting, and she's fairly short as far as babies go, but somehow she managed it. She reached her little foot up to the top of the rail, much like a ballet dancer at the barre, and flung herself over. She hasn't done it since, but I'm sure she'll remember soon enough. Someone I know was telling me about her friend who still has her 3 1/2 year-old twins sleeping in a crib. Seriously? Couldn't they just step over the edge?

Probably the most obnoxious change has been her ultra clinginess. She has always been a fairly cautious baby who has to sit back and take in new situations before venturing too far away, but it's gotten to the point of being ridiculous. I went to my sister's house the other day and she sat with me (uh, on top of me) for over an hour before she would go play. She's never sat still for more than 30 seconds. If I moved in any way, she would FREAK out. I've heard that babies can sense things, so maybe she's picking up on my desire to run away to Cancun, or really, anywhere that babies are not allowed. Not permanently, you know, just...long enough to find some of my sanity.

Not all of the changes in her behavior have been bad. Wait, changes? Who am I kidding. It's not like she was some kind of Easy™ baby to begin with. It's just a new kind of crazy. Just when we figure out the last stage, a new one sweeps in a we're back to the beginning. But, as I was saying, it's not all bad. Audrey's personality has really started to make an appearance over the last couple of months. She loves to make us laugh and really does like to help people. If she hears/sees another kid crying in a store, she tries to give them her blanky (even when we're a couple of aisles away). She's pretty much fearless, and she's willing to try anything. Tonight she was getting up onto this little step stool and then stepping off of it just to see if she could do it without falling (she could). It was about a foot tall. She loves jumping, dancing, spinning, and running. She copies everything I do, and she only needs to see me do something once and she picks it up. She can do jumping jacks, stand on her toes, do pull-ups on the edge of our counters. It's pretty amazing to watch her, but it's also a little scary because I know she's going to grow up always pushing the limits.

It has also been fun to hear her attempting to copy what we say. She says quite a few words rather clearly, but most of the time she just babbles to herself or the cat or us. She loves the cat and won't leave the house without saying, "Bye Ki-eee" whether he's there or not.

Some other things she likes to say:
Audee--Audrey
Bye Daddy! (Anytime he leaves...even if it's just to go to the next room)
Guk--Milk, Truck, Stuck...I haven't figured out the distinction between them yet.
Duce--Juice
Mommy
Doggy
Llama
Mahma--Grandma
Pampa--Grandpa
Ny Ny--Night Night
Mo--More
Car
Hosey--Horsey
Oh! NO!
Oh Mah--Oh man
Guy (There was this guy dressed up in a Ziggy costume-you know, from the lumber store-and she kept following him around saying "Guy!"

Aaaand, there are many more, but I'm sure that was quite enough for today. I guess I will never get bored while dealing with Audrey. Then again, I may never get any sleep either.

This picture was taken on the courthouse steps after the County Centennial Celebration this week. Just in case you were wondering, she's not staring thoughtfully off into the distance, she's looking for Ziggy.

The Great Cupcake Migration

2009-02-14T16:30:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day!!

I don't care what anyone says, nothing says Valentine's Day like Red Velvet cupcakes and cinnamon hearts.

Picture Time!

2009-01-27T23:16:00.000-08:00

Okay, here's another pointless little exercise until I can find the time to post something real. Or until I can find something remotely interesting to write about. Beware, I'm going to tag you...

1. Go to the 4th folder in your computer where you store your pictures.
2. Pick the 4th picture in that folder.
3. Explain the picture.
4. Tag 4 people to do the same.

This is a picture of two of my best friends, Megan (on the left) and Megan (on the right). My husband and I lived in Seattle about a year ago. We lived there only about as long as it takes to get really, really sick, really really fat, and then expel a human being from one's body. Soooo, about ten-ish months. Anyway, Left Megan was living in Seattle going to UW (she is now residing in Argentina until September), and Right Megan came to visit us allll the way from the Land of 10,000 Lakes. We ate at a place on the Ave (in the U-District) called "Gyrocery" which was just as amazing as it sounds (there were Persian rugs and camel skins and the guy working there spoke Arabic) and ate Gyros. Well, they ate the gyros while I poked around at mine while trying not to gag (my daughter's first act of defiance-morning/all day sickness). We then proceeded on to Gasworks. It's a park, not an after-effect of the Gyros. Just in case you were wondering. Gasworks is probably on my top 20 list of favorite places. It's probably not as impressive when I tell you that I've probably only been to 20 places. Still, I love it. It's the only place I've ever run to (for about three miles) and felt good afterward because I could enjoy the lovely view. There's also an impressive fireworks display there every Fourth of July, and by impressive I mean that they played Bohemian Rhapsody. Queen and pyrotechnics. You just can't go wrong...

So, we wandered over to the wonderful land of old coal plants and took in the view of Seattle. Which also happens to be the same view that you can see in this picture. This truly was the fourth picture in the fourth folder in my computer, and I'm surprised that I got such a normal one. In most of the pictures we take, at least one of us is a.) making a weird face b.) on top of someone c.) wrapped around someone, or d.) all of the above. We're a snuggly bunch. Some people call it inappropriate. That's probably true, but I think they may just be jealous of our awesomeness.

Man, this picture makes me miss Seattle. And my Megans.

Well, there you go. Now it's your turn Leah, Jenny, Tessa, Meliss, and Nichole.

Oh Nine.

2009-01-04T15:11:00.000-08:00

Well, this is a little late, but here it is...because Meliss made me do it...

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
My husband and I started playing hockey. It's been a really good time!

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I generally don't make resolutions mostly because I forget about them just about as soon as I make them. I will not be making any for this coming year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
I'm not super close with Anna, but she gave birth to baby Scarlett who is proof that miracles do happen.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Sherm Clayton.

5. What countries did you visit?
Um...just the good 'ol US of A!

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Muscle tone? Ha!

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 1

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I feel pretty good about getting back into shape after having Audrey, and I've been staying active and healthy for the most part.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Just one?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Thankfully no.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My new snowboard! Oh...and our new house!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Wow...um...I'll get back to you on that one...

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
All the politcal/governmental stuff going on right now is really starting to bum me out.

14. Where did most of your money go?
To our new house...and our hockey gear...and mostly to Audrey.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Megan got engaged!

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Well...probably I'm Yours by Jason Mraz...there were slim pickins' this year.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier. I'm alive. Can't complain.
b) thinner or fatter? Thinner
c) richer or poorer? Probably about the same.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
I wish I would have made more time to hang out with friends that I don't see very often.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Weeding.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
We had three.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I guess you could say that...but really, he already caught me...ha!

22. What was your favorite TV program?
It's a toss-up between The Office and SCRUBS.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope.

24. What was the best book you read?
Well, considering I probably only read one, I'll have to say The Innocent Man by John Grisham.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I want to say Regina Spektor. I heard her music before, but I really started appreciating it this year.

26. What did you want and get?
A house. A new snowboard. To sleep more than four hours at a time.

27. What did you want and not get?
To see the other Megan...I'll have to wait until September for that I guess.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
We just watched Traitor, which was really good.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 24 and we went to a Ben Folds concert in Ellensburg. It was pretty fun.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
To have all of my friends in the same state...or town even.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Same as always...casual, comfortable...not resembling a style of any kind.

32. What kept you sane?
Getting more sleep. Finally.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Jim Sturgess

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
I hate politics.

35. Who did you miss?
Lots of people.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I really got to know some people better and made some really good friends.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
God is in control of everything.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I know it's not from this year, but Gone Going by the Black Eyed Peas and Jack Johnson is always a good one...
"What happens if they take your material and you already sold your soul..."

I guess I have to tag someone...okay Leah, Nichole, and Jenny

Our House, in the Middle of Our Street...

2008-12-16T09:55:00.000-08:00

Wow...we've been busy. We just bought a house (or, you know, are in the process of buying one for the next 30 years or so). Yeah. We weren't really looking to move so soon, but everything kind of fell into our laps. It wasn't something we could really pass up because we were already beginning to outgrow our little rental. Well, more like our daughter was outgrowing it. Her room was the office/nursery, which is quite possibly the worst combination ever. Every chance she got, she would scramble onto our office chair and bang on the keyboard which would cause it to come crashing down to the hardwood floor. And break. That, along with the fact that she has about 450 tons of toys and will likely procure even more, was what got us thinking.

It was kind of one of those opportunities that comes along, and will most likely never come again. So, we took it. I'm so happy that we did because it feels so nice to actually have a place of our own! Also, we can have more than two people over at once (our rental was that small).

So basically, I've been busy moving/sanding/priming/painting/cleaning/etc. which takes about three times as long with a 17-month-old in tow. Oh, and we've also been dealing with a new stage called "I CAN HIT/THROW THINGS/WRITHE ON THE GROUND AND SCREAM TO GET MY WAY!". Which isn't actually true-the getting her way part, not the screaming and hitting-but she still tries. I really hope that she gets all of this out of her system before she turns 12 because, seriously, I'm tired. I can't get anything done because when I start something like painting, she spends every second trying to get attention by, you know, eating paint chips, or something equally as dangerous, and then protesting wildly if I take them away. Sometimes she even bangs her head against the wall ("Monica BANG!") to see what I'll do. Which just ends with more crying, somewhat because she didn't realize how much it might hurt to bang her head into the wall, but mostly because I don't react to it. If I do, she'll just do it more.

But, aside from all of the whining and hitting and head-banging, we're doing really well in this house. We love it here. And here's proof that sometimes we really do get along. Here we are bonding over our mutual love of snow. This was the first time she actually got to see snow since last year at this time she was about six months old. She kept looking up at the snow that was falling and saying "OH!" and then trying to catch it.

Simple Geometry

2008-11-19T10:49:00.000-08:00

My daughter has one of those Tupperware Shape-O toys which she randomly brings to me so that I'll open it and dump all the shapes out. Her way of asking is to shake it violently while yelling something like "Uuuuuh!", which is her word for, "Do it now before I really get angry!". We've been working on 'please' and 'thank you' for months now, but I guess she's learned that her way gets the job done quicker. Sadly, it's true. But I digress...

Anyway, she has the Shape-O (I had no idea that it had such a ridiculous name until I Googled it just now) and usually she attempts to put the shapes back in by sheer force. She grabs the star shape for instance and bangs it against the pentagon hole as hard as she can in hopes that she can cause it to cooperate as easily as her parents do...ha. Today, though, I wasn't paying much attention after I had dumped the shapes out, when she came over and quietly handed it to me. I looked down and there were at least four shapes INSIDE the ball! I know I didn't put them there, and she hadn't left the room so my husband hadn't put them there. Apparently either her method of physically forcing the shapes into the ball finally worked, or she grew a couple new brain cells! Although, that theory is under investigation because she is now yelling because my purse is stuck on her arm. Not like wrapped around it, not twisted up in such a way that it is causing her to lose circulation, but just hanging off of her shoulder...

Well, I thought maybe I'd found the next baby genius...yes, she says "Uuuuuh!" in place of actual words, but is also a baby genius...haha. Let me dream.

Colic Frolic

2008-11-12T11:23:00.000-08:00

My daughter is now 15 months old (nearing 16), and my husband and I are just now getting to take a breather. It's been a difficult year. The lack of sleep for the first eleven months of our adventure in parenting caused it to feel a little more like eleven years. I remember people telling us that the first year of marriage would be the hardest. That we should just prepare ourselves because it would get better. Well, our first year(s) were great. We really never argued and although we were attending school full time and working nearly full time, we always had time to spend together.

People never warned us about the first year of parenting. Sure, there was that whole 'Having a baby changes everything' thing, but really. Does that even need to be said? Obviously when a small person exits your uterus (shudder), things are going to be different. I guess it's true that unless you've experienced parenting firsthand, you won't quite understand what it entails, but come on, at least give a girl a clue. Oh, but once we had the baby, the advice-givers (that's a word. really) came out of the wood works. Not really helpful. Especially when we were running on about two hours of sleep between us and all we really needed was not advice, but for the person giving it to take our daughter for a little while and let us sleep.

So, we had a hard, sleep-deprived year and we're just getting to the point that we can spend some time together. For awhile it felt more like we were co-workers just working alongside each other and trying to stay afloat in a never-ending job. With a boss that screamed for at least four months straight at a volume that made our ears bleed, and then intermittently after that for another three months. I just think that either A LOT of people are lying about how easy it was to have a baby, or we just got a raw deal. But now that all of that is behind us, we feel like we can conquer anything. We are now able to truly appreciate her good moments because we know how bad things can get. It's easy to take things for granted when they come easy all of the time.

Now my husband and I have a few hours each night to spend together without our little marsh mellow screaming (now she does it for fun) into our now shell-shocked eardrums. We appreciate the little things that we are able to do, like finish an entire movie, or even TV show in one setting. We've even been playing video games. I will admit to liking video games, mostly because we have Star Wars Battlefront and I can be Chewbacca and make all the funny Chewy sounds.

*Side Note: We've been watching the X-Files on DVD which are sometimes creepy, but mostly just humorous because a.) hello, early nineties TV series! Can't get much better than beige, over sized pantsuits and poofy hair, and b.) Scully and Mulder go to all sorts of exotic locations. Like Mattawa Washington. Seriously, for those of you who know, who goes to Mattawa on purpose? Although, I guess there is a possibility of aliens there. They're just more of the illegal type. But seriously? Mattawa! We were laughing so hard! And they filmed the series in Vancouver, BC so they made it look all forest-y instead of a desert wasteland like it really is. I guess it also made it into a Johnny Cash song though, so what do I know.

Anyway. It's been nice. I almost feel like a real person again (and I know by saying that, I'm just asking for another little bundle of joy to come along and scream in my ear). But honestly. I wouldn't trade any of it (okay, maybe some of it) because our daughter is starting to show her hilarious personality that has stemmed from her ridiculously strong will. It will never be easy with her, and I'm already starting to see that, but we know that she was made just for us. We don't like to sit still very often and neither does she, so at least we'll never be bored.

"How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it."

--Mark Twain

And the Dundy goes to...

2008-10-27T10:20:00.000-07:00

Nine Things You Never Knew...Or Wished You Didn't...

2008-10-22T22:32:00.001-07:00

Random Things About Me (and a couple of random rants):

I cannot tell you how much I want this presidential election to be over. I absolutely HATE politics. I also hate the fact that when I vote this year, I will basically be choosing between the lesser of two evils. I don't really like either candidate and I wish we could have a do-over.

When I went outside earlier tonight, it smelled like it was going to snow. I love that. People don't seem to believe that I can smell snow, but I can. I swear. I can smell it coming.

Um...the city has torn our entire street so that it can be repaved. For about a month now, there have been ruts and holes and giant rocks littering the street and they're just now getting to the point where they're leveling it all out. Apparently it will be another two weeks before they actually pave it. In the meantime, they keep leaving burms of gravel right in front of our driveway. Which is not really a problem since, you know, we don't plan on leaving the house in the next month anyway...ha. Good thing we have a Subaru so we can put that All Wheel Drive to use.

My daughter dances every time she hears the theme song from The Office. Which makes me think that she's probably seen entirely too much of that show for a one-year-old...

Every year, around the middle of the summer, I decide that I cannot take it anymore and I must get a haircut. By the time snowboarding comes around, it's at the awkward stage where it's too short to really put up, but if I leave it down it tickles my neck. I am at that stage now.

I have issues with things touching my neck (see above). I can't stand turtlenecks (not that I would wear one anyway...), and I can't really wear regular t-shirts to bed because the get all bunched up around my neck. It weirds me out when other people touch the front of my neck, and I usually react somewhat violently (not purposely, I can't help it). But really. Who goes around touching someone else's neck anyway? Choker necklaces are out of the question, as are scarves usually. And don't even get me started about when the doctor checks my lymph nodes...aah. I have to sit there and pretend I'm not a freak that is about to punch them in the eye...I don't know. That's my weird little phobia (well, one of them).

My husband and I are going to start playing hockey this November (to take out some of that post-election aggression) in a town nearby. I'm really excited. I used to rollerblade A LOT when I was younger, and I've ice skated a few times, so I'm pretty sure I'll have this hockey thing in the bag. Riiiiiight. Except for the fact that I will be one of the only females and I have absolutely no muscle mass to speak of...okay, maybe a little in the arm area from lugging around my pleasantly plump little Jabba the Hut.

I feel like pregnancy stole my brain. Seriously. I was a little ADD before my daughter came along, and now it's just ridiculous. I can't seem to concentrate on anything. I forget things all the time (one of my biggest pet peeves in others), I lose my train of thought or fail to come up with the right word...Hence the ridiculous list style blog. It's pretty frustrating. Especially for someone who used to pride herself on her vocabulary skills. I can multi-task like a pro now though. I guess that's a plus.

Besides being a stay-at-home mom, I also sell apples on the side. Meet me at the corner later and I can get you some of the good stuff...But really. I work at an apple stand that is owned by my step in-laws, and I love it. I don't know why. Maybe it's because this babymaking thing has turned my brain to oatmeal and it's all I can handle. But it's fun. It's so old-fashioned. There are people who have been coming there since the orchards were planted (in the 50s).

Okay...really. That's enough of that. Hopefully, someday, I can come up with a post that is coherent. It might be awhile. So, in the meantime. Here's my little blue-eyed baby (and her runny nose).

"Umm, I think I like the white shirt better.

Yeah, it's-it's more...

Pensive?

Damn, I was going for thoughtful."

--Ten Things I Hate About You

Did I ever tell you about the time I invented snowboarding?

2008-10-21T23:08:00.000-07:00

This is my new ride...or it will be if the snow decides to fly this year...

2009 Burton Troop

Isn't it pretty? I thought so.

That is all. Boring, I know.

Have a lovely...night? Almost morning? And do a snow dance for your favorite snowboarder!

You Know I Read in a Magazaaaaayne....

2008-10-17T22:43:00.000-07:00

Um...my best friend just got ENGAGED! I am so happy for her! Her fiance proposed yesterday (on her birthday!), and they're planning to get married sometime this coming summer! They are also talking about moving back to her home state (which is where I also happen to reside) after they finish school! Yay!! Okay, too many exclamation marks? Yeah. I thought so too...

Wow. I can't believe it. It makes me think about the excitement of getting engaged and then planning a wedding (c'mon, picking out napkin colors is fun! I swear! I didn't want to bang my head on the nearest light post at all!)...But really. I kind of miss that time back when my husband and I had time to do things together that didn't involve dishes or diapers. And had more than 3 hours of sleep under our belts...in the last year. I guess I've just been feeling kind of old lately. I'm usually tired, which is part of the problem, but it's also the whole spontanaity thing. As in, there is none when a one-year-old is involved. Anything we do takes at least a little planning, and it has to coincide with naptime/bedtime or else we witness the wrath of our little Animal...er...lovely daughter.

I know if I was given the chance I wouldn't trade in the life I have now, but it would be nice to take a nice vacation in my past. Or just any kind of vacation. Seriously. Even if it's just an hour of adult conversation...actually, I don't even care about the whole talking thing. It's overrated. Just an hour without a tiny human attatched to my leg/arm/hair/pant leg would be wonderful...

Okay...so this post didn't go in the direction that I expected...

Uh, moving on. Basically, I'm really happy for my best friend/brain twin. We call ourselves brain twins because our brains are honestly on the same wavelength. I can't even explain it. We think the same things at the same times more often than not. It goes way beyond coincidence. Creepy? A little. But that's how we roll. Once we were cloud gazing with some friends who wanted us to prove our ability, so they asked us to look at a certain cloud and say what we thought it looked like. I kid you not, less than five seconds later we both blurted out the same answer. Elton John. For one, what kind of a cloud looks like Elton John!? And for two, out of the kajillion objects that we each had to choose from, what are the chances we'd both choose that? I don't know.

Anyway. I know I'm a weirdy. You don't have to tell me. I've learned to live with it quite nicely.

PS--My daughter really does resemble Animal from the Muppets. She has a ridiculous amount of hair. It's about halfway down her back already (it's not actually growing on her back...just to clarify). She's also got a bit of a crazy side...to put it nicely. Maybe she'll make a great drummer someday...

"...She's got electrice boots, a mohair suit,

You know I read it in a magazine,

Oh! B B B Bennie and the Jets..."

--Sir Elton John

Remembrance

2008-10-15T19:24:00.000-07:00

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. I could have let this day pass by just like any other day (and almost did), but that's just the problem. People are not really aware that women (and men) everywhere are suffering daily because the baby they had waited and planned for was taken from them too soon. Some are desperately trying to conceive, and for some reason or another, are not able to. It's something that is sort of just swept under the rug.

A little over two years ago, I had a miscarriage. I was only about five or six weeks along, and had only actually known that I was pregnant for a few days, but it was still very painful. I think that one of the worst parts about it was the way some people treated us (especially the medical billing staff at the hospital). Many of the nurses and staff members were very nonchalant about it, like it happened every day so maybe I should just get over it. Others really didn't know what to say, so they would say things like "you're young, you can have another baby" or "at least you weren't that far along", which was worse than saying nothing at all. I realize that there are people our there who have suffered more than I can ever imagine, but that doesn't make my pain any less real. The experience taught me to be thankful for what I have. I was able to go on and have a healthy pregnancy, and am now blessed with a beautiful daughter. It also helped me to realize that God is in control of my life and His timing is perfect.

What I want to convey is: be aware of those around you who may be suffering. Do not discount another person's pain just because it's not something you've personally experienced. A death of a baby, no matter how premature, is life-altering.

So, on this day, think about those around you who have experienced a loss. Pray for them. Let them know that you care. Remember that you may not know what someone else is going through, so treat people with kindness.

Hello

2008-10-11T17:54:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my new blog. I'm still in the process of getting all moved in here, and it's been made more difficult by my 15-month-old daughter's demand that I spend EVERY! WAKING! MOMENT! in her direct line of sight. Which is much better than crying every waking moment (her, not me) so I should be grateful! So, anyway, here I am. Enjoy. I am off to entertain the small dictator who lives in my spare bedroom.